Telehealth Services

We continue to welcome new clients to schedule appointments with the best match within our group. All of our appointments are virtual: care when you need it, on your terms.

At Frey & Associates we have found that both our clients and clinicians genuinely enjoy, and prefer, telehealth services. Why telehealth? Click the button below to learn more about why we provide our services virtually.

Please reach out to see if we can be of help getting you scheduled with one of our clinicians, or if we can connect you to additional resources. We strive to respond to all inquiries as quickly as possible.

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Melissa: welcoming spring

Finally, Spring has arrived! Spring, often thought of as as season of renewal, brings fresh air, sun, light, and growth.

In honor of Spring having finally begun in the Midwest, below is a poem by the poet Ava Lemon that so beautifully captures the spirit of the season.

Instructions on Not Giving Up by Ada Limón

More than the fuchsia funnels breaking out
of the crabapple tree, more than the neighbor’s
almost obscene display of cherry limbs shoving
their cotton candy-colored blossoms to the slate
sky of Spring rains, it’s the greening of the trees
that really gets to me. When all the shock of white
and taffy, the world’s baubles and trinkets, leave
the pavement strewn with the confetti of aftermath,
the leaves come. Patient, plodding, a green skin
growing over whatever winter did to us, a return
to the strange idea of continuous living despite
the mess of us, the hurt, the empty. Fine then,
I’ll take it, the tree seems to say, a new slick leaf
unfurling like a fist to an open palm, I’ll take it all.

mindful moment

Song of March

by Patricia L. Cisco

With winter’s footprints in the past,
and snows begin to melt at last.

With longer days and shorter nights,
the wayward winds of March take flight.

Four winds she holds within her grip,
then hurls them from her fingertip.

Her woolly, fleecy clouds of white,
she sets in skies of blue delight.

Her wild bouts of gusty breezes
roar through valleys, hills, and trees.

That high pitch whistling song she sings
awakens earth and flowering things.

She tears a hole in heaven’s sky
so sun can shine and rain can cry.

She gently calms as spring draws near,
as blooming daffodils appear.

She welcomes April showers in,
then gathers up her dwindling winds.
Now her long journey home begins,

knowing she’ll be back this way,
upon a cold, late winter’s day,

when nights grow short
and days grow long.

Listen for her whistling song!

Melissa: social media breaks

Around the time of a new year, many of us think through how to best consider changes in our behaviors and actions. On many lists of “changes to make” is considering a break or a slowing down of usage of social media. Not sure if that would be for you? A piece from Harvard helps people evaluate when a break from social media might be worth considering:

Recognizing When You Need a Break

Considering all of the above, you may be ready for a break. Ask yourself the following questions if you think it’s time to reevaluate your relationship with social media:

  • Do you come away from your interactions on social media feeling inspired, informed, and positive? Or are you drained, saddened, frustrated, overwhelmed, depressed, anxious, angry, or negative?
  • Do you find yourself on a social media app, yet don’t remember picking up your phone and tapping on the app?
  • Is the amount of time you’re spending on social media taking away from time you used to spend with friends or family, doing schoolwork, or doing other productive activities?
  • Are you constantly comparing your life to the lives you see on social media, and think that you could never “catch up”?
  • Have any friends or family members expressed concern that you’re on social media too much, or that you talk about what you see there too much?
  • Do you have more activities and relationships in real life, or do you conduct most of your life on social media?
  • Do you just have a feeling you need to take a break, but aren’t sure how?”

If any of those questions resonate with you, it might be worth reading into the article further here.

Remember: always progress over perfection!

Copyright © Melissa A. Frey, LCSW 2024. All rights reserved.

mindful moment

To the New Year

By  W. S. MERWIN

With what stillness at last
you appear in the valley
your first sunlight reaching down
to touch the tips of a few
high leaves that do not stir
as though they had not noticed
and did not know you at all
then the voice of a dove calls
from far away in itself
to the hush of the morning
so this is the sound of you
here and now whether or not
anyone hears it this is
where we have come with our age
our knowledge such as it is
and our hopes such as they are
invisible before us
untouched and still possible

melissa: meditation and anxiety apps

We often get questions about options for apps that can assist in mindfulness, meditation, and overall anxiety management. To save our clients the leg work, we have a list of resources on this page of our website. I particularly like the app Simple Habit, which has a free version and also an option that allows you to pick a specific stressor or goal paired with a targeted guided meditation. I also like the app Down Dog for free yoga instruction, which can be targeted for the level of yoga and duration of time you’d like to use it for.

With so many options for apps, it can be easy to overlook that there are also a lot of options for mental health and wellness podcasts to listen to as well. We list podcasts this page of our website as well, and there are plenty more that are released and up and coming that can be found, for example, here and here. Lastly, there are additional app reviews and options here and here, should you want to read more! The possibilities are endless- happy listening!

Copyright © Melissa A. Frey, LCSW 2023. All rights reserved. 

melissa: boundary setting

Boundary setting is one topic that comes up frequently in our lives and in therapy. Boundary setting, for most people, is a learned skill. Some people seem to learn that skill earlier in life, while others learn it later in life. How would one know if they needed to work on setting stronger boundaries for themselves? Well, one place to start is to ask yourself if you feel:

1) Guilty or anxious for saying no to requests

2) Resentful or upset that you feel you’re often doing a lot for others

3) Taking less time than you’d prefer to take care of yourself and are more focused on taking care of others (there are certainly many life circumstances that can make this one particularly difficult, ex. parenting, caregiving, etc)

If you can relate to any of the above statements, it might be worth considering (or reconsidering) how to best set boundaries in your life. Boundary setting, for many people, is a lifelong journey and is a muscle that gets stronger over time. Want to learn about how to set boundaries, with specific skills? You can read more here. There’s also a Harvard Business Review article here to help guide you further. Want additional support? Give us a call, send us a text, or send us an email.

“The only people who get upset when you start setting boundaries are the ones who benefited from you not having them.”

Copyright © Melissa A. Frey, LCSW 2023. All rights reserved.

mindful moment

Oh, give us pleasure in the flowers to-day;
And give us not to think so far away
As the uncertain harvest; keep us here
All simply in the springing of the year.

-Robert Frost

mindful moment

The only journey is the one within…

And now we welcome the new year. Full of things that have never been.

-Rainer Maria Rilke

all of us: with gratitude

As this year comes to a close, we are wishing everyone a quiet and restful transition into the new year. We are so honored accompany our clients on their journeys of growth, healing, and wellness. We look forward to continue working with our current clients and welcoming new clients in the upcoming new year.

From all of us at Frey and Associates,

Happy New Year!

Copyright © Melissa A. Frey, LCSW 2022. All rights reserved.

mindful moment

Wild Geese

You do not have to be good.
You do not have to walk on your knees
For a hundred miles through the desert, repenting. You only have to let the soft animal of your body
love what it loves.
Tell me about despair, yours, and I will tell you mine. Meanwhile the world goes on.
Meanwhile the sun and the clear pebbles of the rain are moving across the landscapes,
over the prairies and the deep trees,
the mountains and the rivers.
Meanwhile the wild geese, high in the clean blue air, are heading home again.
Whoever you are, no matter how lonely,
the world offers itself to your imagination,
calls to you like the wild geese, harsh and exciting — over and over announcing your place
in the family of things.

– Mary Oliver

melissa: what we’re reading

Therapists are almost always reading some sort of therapy book (in the background of their fiction pile), in my experience. We often are asked about books for specific subjects and love offering recommendations, so always ask if you’ve got a topic in mind.

In the meantime, here are some of the books our clinicians are reading now:

All About Love: New Visions by bell hooks

A very accessible book about every facet of love, including a working definition of the action of giving and receiving love.

The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel van der Kolk

The cult following/classic about how the brain, mind, and body are connected in the framework of trauma.

Attached. by Amir Levine and Rachel Heller

Another very accessible book about attachment styles; extremely helpful to understanding one’s own attachment style, independent of any relationship status.

Copyright © Melissa A. Frey, LCSW 2022. All rights reserved.

mindful moment

Courage doesn’t always roar. Sometimes courage is the little voice at the end of the day that says I’ll try again tomorrow.

– Mary Anne Radmacher

melissa: kintsugi + wabi sabi

During times that feel (and are) particularly challenging, as has often been the case in the past couple of years, we may be left wondering how to continue to find hope and healing.  One thought that comes to mind is the Japanese concept of kintsugi. “Kintsugi is the Japanese art of putting broken pottery pieces back together with gold — built on the idea that in embracing flaws and imperfections, you can create an even stronger, more beautiful piece of art.”

In the West, the concept of kintsugi is often paired with the phrase wabi sabiLoosely translated, “wabi” is simplicity, whether elegant or rustic; “sabi” means the beauty of age and wear. While academics have varying definitions of this phrase, they all come back to a generalized concept of embracing that which is flawed, asymmetrical, unfinished, and imperfect. The etiology of these concepts traces back prior to the 14th century, when the phrases began to take a more “positive” feeling of noting the beauty in the imperfect and unfinished.  For Richard Powell, “Wabi-sabi nurtures all that is authentic by acknowledging three simple realities: nothing lasts, nothing is finished, and nothing is perfect.”[6]

One can do a very deep research dive on kintsugi and wabi sabi and find some beautiful ceramics, theories, research, books, quotes, and more. As many of us tend to do, you can easily start your reading on Wikipedia, and take off from there, should you be so inclined. If you desire no further research or reading, then simply imagine yourself as a ceramic pot with a few cracks and breaks, assembled back together with gold, with light shining through. That unfinished, asymmetrical, lopsided, beautiful piece of art work is you, and it can always be repaired when, inevitably, it has a tiny (or large) crack. That, surely, is an endless source of hope.

Copyright © 2022 Melissa A. Frey, LCSW. All rights reserved.

 

melissa: free mindful apps

One of the questions we are often asked is regarding where to find useful mindfulness resources and apps for meditation and/or anxiety, sleep and mood. Look no further, mindful.org has compiled a list of free apps to consider and their descriptions. A list of those free mindful and meditation apps can be found here. Interested in books or journals? We’ve got our list here. If you’re looking for additional resources that are not listed here, let us know!

“Don’t search for anything except peace. Try to calm the mind. Everything else will come on its own.”

Baba Hari Das

Copyright ©Melissa A. Frey, LCSW 2022. All rights reserved.